On Failure

Waiting for exam results:

Dear readers, throw me a lifeline; I am in limbo! 

When I started to write The Fit Pixie blog, I intended to document my progress as I study to become a fitness instructor. However, at that point I didn't reckon on a few important factors, like mad revising for exams, or trying to learn choreography (much harder than I imagined!)- both of which have been filling my recent days to the exclusion of all blogging.

I took my written exams a few days ago. And this is why I am in limbo: it might be three weeks until I know whether I have passed. And the not-knowing is rendering me incapable of thinking about anything else. I suppose that if I was confident that I have passed I would not be so concerned, but I feel the assessments could have gone either way. I feel like I had enough knowledge to qualify- I certainly studied hard- but I did not always understand the wording of the questions, and what was really being asked. 

Now, I am quite a private person. Nobody likes to admit their potential failings in public, least of all a private person so I wasn't going to write about this, but in the interests of growing as an individual, and being true to the aim of The Fit Pixie, there it is! 

I feel a little liberated. 

Potential failure:

So, now that is off my chest I wonder why it is so hard to own up to situations like this? 

I look at instagram a fair bit. There are very many beautiful strong people with amazing bodies on display there. I heartily congratulate every single one of them, and I thank them for the inspiration. But at the same time, I worry slightly about just how perfect they are. Has the selfie generation made super-fit the only acceptable standard? 

I mean, there are plenty of 'before and after' body transformation photos, plenty of motivational true stories... but there are no 'during' snaps are there? There are no bed-head selfies in sweat pants, with the hashtag #nomotivation are there? No photographs of beautiful running routes with the caption 'I walked the last half mile', no admissions of 'I wasn't quite ready for that, but I will be next time I try'. 

Why don't we own our failures? Surely they are as much a part of any journey as the successes? 

Practice, not perfection:

'It's yoga practice, not yoga perfect', so the saying goes. Can't this be applied to all fitness activities, partly because everybody has different aims and reasons for working out: lose weight, feel stronger, de-stress, shared social experience...? The motivations are as complex as we are, and if our aims are so different, then one person's failure might surely be another person's 'no big deal'? 

But when faced with inspirational characters who appear perfect in every way, do we come to equate success with perfection? Is the rise in popularity of fitness bloggers and picture-posters just competitive narcissism? 

It felt like a big deal to me that I might not pass my assessments. But... is it? I can re take them, so maybe I just haven't passed them yet. I guess failing is only a big deal if you want it to be. 

Whilst I'm at it, I have a few more admissions: I can't do handstands, I don't have a six-pack, and I'm not great at spin classes. But, as with my exams, I'd like to qualify all of these with 'yet'.   

Here's a blogging pledge:

I'm not an expert. I'm not perfect. I am not yet as fit and strong as I intend to become. 

I pledge to continue to write my blog in the spirit of these statements, and to own my failures. 

And... I'll let you know if I passed (or failed) my assessments. 

(Edited on April 6th: I passed my written exams! Now for the practical results..,)

Online Yoga Video Review: 'Slo Mo Flo' on Udaya

A few weeks ago I signed up to the Udaya online yoga video website. I've been doing just a about a class a week to compliment my other activities, with mixed results: sometimes the practice has felt really satisfying and sometimes it just hasn't.

Online Yoga Classes: 

One of the beauties of online exercise classes of all types is that you get to pick and choose what you want to do, and who you want to guide you through it. This is obviously great, as the variety is endless (plus you get to pause it when your loving other half surprises you with an espresso half way through!). However, there are also drawbacks to changing your teachers all the time: it can be difficult to follow a new instructor that you're not familiar with, especially when you are in a pose that doesn't easily allow you to watch the screen. This is exacerbated when the class is fast. 

Which was one of the motivating factors in why I chose this class: 'Slo Mo Flo' with Adam Husler. The slow pace appealed to me. I was also drawn to the '2' difficulty rating, as the Udaya classes do seem to be on the more challenging side (although I have done other '2'-rated classes that have involved at least four head/hand stands, plus the splits thrown in- which dispiritingly I can do none of- hence I was still wary). 

Class Review:

True to it's title, this was a slow-moving class, but it would be a mistake to think that slow means easy- which suits me: I am always up for a work out! But when someone says "high plank is your happy place today" you know what's coming is going to be a little bit challenging.

My legs were shaking with exertion at one point, so I was reassured when Adam said something along the lines of: "our legs really enjoy the stretching in yoga, but they don't always enjoy the work". It's these empathetic remarks from an instructor when you're working hard that make you feel like you're not completely out of your league. 

The slow pace allowed me to better understand the transitions between poses, which to be honest is not something I have given much thought to in the past. 

I also enjoyed the instructing style, as it felt like there was plenty of information to work out whether you are holding a pose or doing a movement well enough to be getting the best out of it. 

Class Highlights:

It was the fine details which really made this class interesting to me: for example I learnt so much about how to fine tune the position of the hands, and exactly how to hold the foot to make the best of a leg extensions, which combined to make it a really rewarding learning experience rather than just a work-out. 

One part of the class I particularly enjoyed was when we twisted through a lunge. I've not come across this before but it's one aspect of my mobility i'd really like to improve. 

I also feel like I learnt a lot about my chair pose, and how to improve it. In earlier versions I have done I feel like maybe I didn't pull my derrière in enough (see below!). 

Does my bum look big in this...?

Satisfaction...?

I will certainly repeat this class, for the important reasons that I feel like it would improve my practice to work more on this routine, plus I enjoyed it!

I would also recommend it if you'd like to work on your strength and stamina- good for all exercise goals, not just yoga. 

You can find the teacher, Adam Husler here on Instagram

Quick, Healthy Store Cupboard Dinner

Healthy Ideas:

I've got some lovely recipe books full of healthy meal ideas, but sometimes when there is no opportunity to plan or shop, I am left wondering what I can eat that isn't going to undo my hard work at the gym. 

Today was just such a day, but I decided to improvise a guilt-free dish from what I had available, and it was so yummy that I thought I would share it with you. 

You can re-create it exactly as I made it, or substitute whatever ingredients you have lying around. Let me know how you get on and what great combinations you discover. 

Ingredients: 

(serves two hungry people)

I used half a floret of broccoli,

3 celery sticks, 

a small amount of onion,  

half a courgette, 

a carrot, 

a large handful of mixed nuts,

approximately 50g pumpkin seeds, 

a large spoon of honey,

a large spoon of lemon juice

How to make your healthy dinner:

Cut the broccoli into small pieces, and slice the celery. Put into a saucepan with a well-fitting lid with about 1cm of water in the bottom. Cook over a low heat, stirring often but with the lid on between stirring, and steam the veg lightly until just tender. Drain into a sieve. 

Finely dice the onion and put into the pan with as little oil as you can get away with to keep it from sticking to your pan (I used about a teaspoon). Replace the lid again and sweat until tender.

Grate the courgette and carrot. Return broccoli and celery to the pan, along with grated veg, nuts and seeds. Stir well over a medium-low heat until you decide it is 'done'- a couple of minutes ought to do it. 

Add the honey and lemon juice, stir well, and enjoy!

Welcome!

Welcome to my new blog, which I intend to be a space for me to reflect on the process of becoming a fitness instructor, to share some of the trials and tribulations as I aim to be the fittest I can be, and to connect with other bloggers with similar interests. 

Keeping fit is great fun, but also challenging by its very nature. Of course there is the volume of work needed, but there is also the problem of how to best manage your fitness- how do you know what is really benefitting you? When should you have a rest day? Is it easier to work out by yourself or with others? What is it best to eat...? So many questions! 

I am studying for my 'Exercise to Music' qualification, but I am not planning to leave my education there. 

I really enjoy participating in exercises classes: aerobics, spin, circuits, both Yoga & Pilates; I like to go for a jog, and I am really trying to improve my swimming so that I feel I can work out in the pool- I sense a whole post in the near future on my struggles there! If I get the chance to try a few yoga moves or have a jog in the great outdoors then not much will stop me!

Last summer I was lucky enough to try kayaking (which is very popular where I live), and I loved it, so this is something I am hoping to do more of in the future. 

Warrior 2 on top of the World. I really felt like a warrior up here, but I was so disappointed when I saw in the photo that my back leg seems bent- I though for sure it was straight. Something to work on...

So, are you trying to get fit? Do you have an interest in nutrition? Do you teach exercise classes? Do you have advice? What are your goals?

Whether it's a lucky pair of trainers or a favourite brand of protein shake, I'm interested, and I'd love to hear from you. Don't be shy, leave me a comment.

<:-) Pixie x